Hello 🙂 welcome to my little space.
Truthfully, it’s not easy to start off something from passion. For a long while, painting (or my idea of mellowpaints) was my little secret. I was afraid and scared of giving it a shot. Part of that fear stemmed from the possibilities of what others might say to me. Another part of that fear comes from uncertainty.
That was it. It was uncertainty.
I’ve done many side projects in my spare time. When I was younger, I yearned to be a writer (as many of us do). I wrote a novella, poetry, got published here and there and launched a writing project. The growth was slow, but I did get many good opportunities out of it. It built my portfolio and allowed me to collaborate with many around the world. After 3 years though, I gave up. It wasn’t something I felt was sustainable. I was uncertain if I could even keep it up.
That was just one example.
This is my third time attempting mellowpaints, and it’s all been through trial and error.
My first attempt I called it ‘melly.ism’ and it didn’t resonate with me. I didn’t have anything to work for it. I posted random paintings I did at odd intervals, and it wasn’t sustainable. I didn’t have a clear direction.
My second attempt was more fruitful. I was pumped and excited. I somehow made a schedule for myself to paint consistently. I went out and splurged on canvases, timed myself on the days I need to paint and backlog content, pick out days where I can photograph.
Sounds seamless, right?
In actual fact, it was a trainwreck. I found myself being burnt out faster than I knew. I slowly started to hate the painting process. Yeah sure, I loved painting, but my purpose for sharing on mellowpaints wasn’t good. I was obsessed with painting (no pun intended) a perfect picture, and there wasn’t anything at all about my journey.
This blog is how I want to change that.
I watched 73 Questions with Anna Wintour (the Vogue series where the cameraguy follows big names around and they answer questions in a quick fire manner), and she mentioned one of the most overused words is ‘journey’. Very true. Here I am still using it though, because I can’t find another word that accurately illustrates this whole adventure.
One thing that discouraged me was how ‘perfect’ artists had it on social media. Their photos were immaculous; bright and fun. Their profiles had a strong recurring theme. They had their palettes down. Every one of them had a running website, paintings/artwork for sale. Their stories were of them constantly creating. It was as though struggles didn’t exist. I felt that I was on an island. Nobody talked about being human.
Then, it hit me. I’m not a machine. I love creating, but I can’t constantly create. This is what mellowpaints, or this blog, aims to combat. Pursuing a passion and hobby outside of your safe space is always a scary thing. It takes lots of grit and sacrifice. I want to document every aspect of this project.
I guess this is more of a journal than a painting blog. Perhaps I’ll post guides here and there on my experiences. More than anything, I want this to be a space for people to realise that there’s always more to things than we think.